My health - Diabetes

I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes just before Christmas 2018... I am (now) 41 years old. My diagnosis came because I was thirsty as all hell and had a cyst that I needed taken care of. Once the doctors took care of my cyst, they drew some blood, that's when they said my A1C levels were at a 42, the second highest that doctor had ever seen. I had to stay at the hospital and get an IV to clean the sugars out of my system. They were dangerously high! I had no idea that diabetes was even a factor, no other doctors had caught it before then.
From there, I was sent to my family doctor to talk about my A1C levels and get medication and information on my new diagnosis. So much was thrown at me all at once information wise, it was a lot to take in. I will tell you DO NOT try and figure out diabetes on your own through google or other websites or social media. No one has the same kind of diabetes and there's so much information and misinformation you'll get overwhelmed like I did and highly confused and frustrated.
My doctor gave me Metformin and two kinds of insulin. I was to take 2 of the Metformin pills twice a day and the Humelog insulin 3 times a day; at each meal and the Lantus insulin at bed time. I now take between 10 and 23 units of insulin at each meal and 45 units at bed time and my sugars are STILL between 15 and 23!

People will tell you that you get diabetes from eating too much or drinking too much sugars. THIS IS COMPLETELY FALSE! People will also try and tell you that you can cure diabetes, this is also COMPLETELY FALSE!! You cannot cure your pancreas DYING! That's why I say, there's so much misinformation out there it's disgusting. It's as bad as false news.
You can control your diabetes with a very strict diet and medication and exercise but you cannot cure it.  Those who have it under control and are no longer in need of medication are lucky and have to understand that if they were to STOP their diet, their diabetes would come right back out of control again. It's not gone or cured per say, it's just controlled.

My diabetes is HIGHLY out of control, to the point I cannot work. My doctor has signed me off work and is filling out paper work to get me on AISH (long term disability). I have high blood pressure, pain, insomnia, anxiety, and more pain... plus stress, confusion, sometimes I feel down, not depressed but down because of all of this.
I have to see my family doctor monthly (sometimes more), I have a pharmacist I see at the clinic as well as a nurse. I see the pharmacist at the clinic every 6 months and the nurse monthly. I see a counsellor twice a month, sometimes more if I need to. Then when I go to the pharmacy, I work with one pharmacist there. Then I also was seeing a dietitian monthly but quit seeing her as she was not helpful. I have to have my eye health checked every 6 months and my A1C levels checked every 3 months.

I have a lock box so full of pills to take daily it's unreal. I take Tylenol for pain, Gabapentin for pain, another medication for pain, see the chiropractor monthly for pain, I take pills for blood pressure, a pill for acid reflux for all the meds and heart burn I now get. I take pills for sleep... then the two different types of insulin daily, metformin, and now, another needle weekly. It's insane. I'm pretty much a walking drug store.

Making sure I don't miss taking my needles or medications or take the wrong ones at the wrong times is very stressful. I HATE it with a PASSION! It can be very overwhelming. That's why I keep them in pill bottles and in a lock box. Not only so no one gets at them but also because I can know where they are at all times, how many I have, know when I need refills and when to take them because it's on the bottle labels.

Trying to eat well for diabetes is a PAIN IN THE ASS! Especially when you live in a small town of just over 3000 people with ONE grocery store. The store here has HIGH prices compared to stores in the cities. Most of the time I will travel to Lethbridge, Okotokes or Calgary to get groceries at places like Walmart or Costco. Might cost a bit in gas but it saves a lot in the long run. I think it's ignorant that the grocery stores in small towns with hike their prices because they know that it's more of a pain to go out of town to get what you need. I think it shouldn't be allowed. Plus they hike the price of gas in small towns. In Calgary, Lethbridge and Okotokes the gas prices are at 98 or 99c per L. In small towns it's $1.08 per L. Talk about ripping people off! Makes me so frustrated they do this.

Today I had to go to the optometrist to get my eye health checked again, it's fine. So far my diabetes has not affected my sight but it can. It can make you go blind. Before my diagnosis I never wore glasses, now I wear bi-focals. Pisses me off in that short amount of time of having diabetes my sight has changed that much.

I've also been told to really watch my feet! I thought people were crazy telling me that but, apparently if you get the smallest of infections in your feet, you can lose your limb! WTF!?! So, I try to keep my feet dry and warm and safe at all times. If I was to lose a limb, I'd want to not be here any more. I'd be so angry, depressed and frustrated. I don't want to live that way.

The PAIN from diabetes is FUCKED!!! I am in pain DAILY!! I hate it so much. My lower back is constantly sore, my hips, legs, shoulders and sometimes I get headaches and stomach pain. I take 4 different kinds of medications for the pain and NONE are working. I see the chiropractor and that doesn't help. I don't know what will. My feet get so sore it's hard to walk. I also get lower stomach pains and spotting... I take the Depo Provera needle every 3 months, normally it takes my period away completely but lately, for the last 3 months I've been spotting. I've also noticed very small amounts of blood in my stool. The doctor is sending me to Lethbridge for an ultra sound to see what is going on.
I also suffer from PCOS (Polysystic ovarian syndrome). This causes weight gain, pain, bloating and can make it difficult and or impossible to have children. So, I take Depo Provera to help with the pain... normally it works but lately with the diabetes it's NOT helping. Nothing seems to make my pain go away.

People don't understand this disease, they think oh, you're fine... you can take your insulin and you'll be fine. Sure, some people are fine that way but others, like ME are NOT fine. We suffer and struggle. It's an invisible disease... people need to be more informed and understanding to others and inform themselves before saying things and assuming they know and understand.

My doctor told me the health of my HEART is that of an 80 year old woman and I am only 41!! That's TERRIFYING! The doctor said I can DROP DEAD from a heart attack or stroke at ANY TIME! I have to stay out of stressful situations so that doesn't happen and watch what I eat and drink.
I have to wear an emergency alert necklace and ring so that if anything were to happen, the medical teams know that I am diabetic.

As my days go on, I'll talk more about how things are going with my health, any changes good or bad and how I'm feeling and dealing with it. I will keep writing about it in hopes that it can help someone else who is struggling with their diabetes.